Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Being Sick and the Scriptures

In the past couple years I have gained two favorite scriptures. I don't usually have favorite ones because I feel like they are all good at different times and for different reasons. But the two that I keep going back to time after time are Alma 7:11&12  And Proverbs 3: 5&6. Just recently I have felt the power of both of these in my life. 

I have been very sick lately. I'm allergic to gluten and although I've been eating gluten free for two years I have started to have issues again and not feeling very well. I got an appointment with a GI (gut) doctor for September. Then suddenly a cancellation happened and I got bumped up almost a moth. When I went to the doctor he said I needed a biopsy and a scope done to figure things out. So we planned that for tomorrow. I was feeling alright at the time all of this happened. Having a few issues but could live my life without major problems. 
Then last Thursday I started getting sick and each day it got worse and worse.  I am at an all time low in my gluten adventure. I feel so sick and I don't know what's going on or why this is happening!   
Well yesterday while I felt like death I found out I didn't get the job I REALLY wanted and really thought I had in the bag. That makes two jobs in one week that I thought would be perfect but have fallen through. I felt defeated. My mom helped me by saying that whatever happens is because Heavenly Father knows what I need right now. I wasn't' finding comfort through anything that I did. Then I opened my scriptures. First I opened to Alma chapter seven and read 

And he shall go forth, suffering pains and aafflictions andbtemptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will ctake upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people.
 12 And he will take upon him adeath, that he may bloose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to csuccor his people according to their infirmities.
That scripture talks of the atonement of Jesus Christ. I have found comfort in the scripture countless times when I was struggling. I never however really paid much attention to the sicknesses part. Christ atoned for our sicknesses, HE UNDERSTANDS COMPLETELY! He knows what it's like to celiac disease and food allergies that make you feel like your dying! He gets it!  And the reason he gets it? So he can help us! So he knows how to succor us! 

The second scripture I read was the one in Proverbs. 
aTrust in the Lord with all thine bheart; and lean not unto thine cown dunderstanding.
 In all thy ways aacknowledge him, and he shall bdirect thycpaths.
I realized that the Lord was guiding my life! He knew that I would bee too sick to work those jobs, He knew I needed time to figure out what's wrong and find ways of getting better. I believe He also helped me get the sooner doctor appointment so I could start getting help faster.  So although I feel like crap, and I'm scared about tomorrow, I can't help but feel so thankful to my Heavenly Father for loving me so perfectly, and thankful for His son, who gave everything so He can understand me, and heal me! 

Friday, August 10, 2012

Liquid Thrill

I let the water heal me
the way it always seems to do
Each tiny droplet breaking in splendor
If magic existed
it would be found in rain
A little mesage from above
that things are bigger than just myself
I walk the earth barefoot
the water twisting my hair to curls
It is welcome and intimate
rolling off my lips and cheeks
creeping down my neck
Deeply I breath it in
let it sing wispered secrets in my ears
reaching out as it slowly stops
leaving everything
wet, tranquil and humming